Alhamdullillah...

Alhamdullillah...all the meetings is done for now! I was too nervous n worried with this one major meeting...and alhamdullilah it was turn out not too bad...gud indeed! alhamdullillah praise to the Almighty. I hope that the grant that we apply will be granted. I just praying for the best! What ever the outcome is... i'm ok!

So now...i can focus on my trip back home..yipeeeeeeeee!!! i'm too excited! i have to do more shopping...thanks to my hubby for his last minute lists. :) tonight we gonna have a bbq (oppssss..fireban today!!) so i'm not sure what is going to happen...cancel or just proceed with extra precaution!! huhuhuhu bbq...bbq...bbq...i'm starving it's 4pm now and i haven't eat anything from morning...nervous strucked me sooo badly leave me not having my breakfast&lunch. and now i am starving...

At the office for my last day...update the important documents n tidy up my desk n say gudbye to everyone. Thanks for yesterday lunch my dear officemates... it was very nice....a part of walking in the oven's weathering! And now...i going to pen off and go home...n EAT.

Daaaaaa....till then...

WEDNESDAY is down...2 days to go...

Wed, Thurs, Fri....SATURDAY!

The atmosphere is now HOT! HOT! HOT!! The waiting is killing me....

I wanna go home rite now!!

I wanna fly home rite away!!!!! that is my feeling rite now! too many things to be done n yet i don't have the heart to do all of them! terrible feeling. terrible attitude.huhuhuhuhu.

saya nak balik jumpak..fazly fahmi fatini. nak balik jumpak mak. ayah-notsure.sumer.kaklong.kakchik.iwan.huhuhu.sangat2 rindu.sangat2 tak sabaq nak balik. barang2 dah pack kalau nak balik sekarang pun dah buleh!. cuma tix tarikhnya 31 jan 09 at 3.40pm. kalau tukaq tarikh kena bayaq lagik. det dah abih. so kenalah sabaq2kan diri dan stay fokus. takleh fokus dah nih...huhuhuhu.

I LOVE U ALL....

Next week balik...insyaAllah. yabedabedooo..tak sabarnya. be a mom again. be a wife again. be a daughter again. be a sis again. Life is so wonderful back home. Someone that you love and care is close to you. Hope everything goes well before balik...amin

You've got message...

Alhamdullillah my student visa have been granted today by Ms Janetta Velkovska officer of DIAC, Mebourne. I am grateful that Allah eased my journey so far! It was just a simple email...but it made my heart filled with joy and hope!

Dear Ms Abdul Hamid,

Please note, that i have granted your student today and sent out the letter with your documents. You now have a valid visa until the 21/09/2009

Janetta Velkovski
Case ManagerVisa and Citizenship Services
03 8682 2039

There was alwez sign for me...like for this time i've noticed sumthing when i've got her contact number...ermmm looking gud! her contact number ended with my lucky number!!! 39. I dunno why I alwez serounded by these two numbers. It made me a bit nervous n wondered how thing will turn out for me... and alhamdullillah-visa granted.

I am thankful to the Almighty for his approval. He knows what the best for us...

You gotta be

Listen as your day unfolds

Challenge what the future holds

Try and keep your head up to the sky

Lovers, they may cause you tears

Go ahead release your fears

Stand up and be counted

Don't be ashamed to cry

You gotta be bad, you gotta be bold, you gotta be wiser

You gotta be hard, you gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger

You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm, you gotta stay together

All I know, all I know, love will save the day

Herald what your mother said

Reading the books your father read

Try to solve the puzzles in your own sweet time

Some may have more cash than you

Others take a different view

My oh my, heh, hey

You gotta be bad, you gotta be bold, you gotta be wiser

You gotta be hard, you gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger

You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm, you gotta stay together

All I know, all I know, love will save the day

Don't ask no questions, it goes on without you

Leaving you behind if you can't stand the pace

The world keeps on spinning

You can't stop it, if you try to

This time it's danger staring you in the face

Remember

Listen as your day unfolds

Challenge what the future holds

Try and keep your head up to the sky

Lovers, they may cause you tears

Go ahead release your fears

My oh my heh, hey, hey

You gotta be bad, you gotta be bold, you gotta be wiser

You gotta be hard, you gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger

You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm, you gotta stay together

All I know, all I know, love will save the day

You gotta be bad, you gotta be bold, you gotta be wiser

You gotta be hard, you gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger

You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm, you gotta stay together

All I know, all I know, love will save the day

You gotta be lyrics by Des'ree

17 Januari 2009

Hellooo sayang mama...hari ni terasa mendalam betul rindduuuuu dekat my dearest sweethearts yang dok di PB n Bukit Rambai tuh...My hubby tengah dok demam..kesian dier..sabar yer... Yang dok Bukit Rambai pun baru ja lepas baik dari demam... musim agaknya kat Malaysia! Yang kat Melbourne pun rasanya seram sejuk badan dek kerana cuaca yang tak menentu...kejap panas kejap sejuk...tak tahan betullah.

Hari ni dah masuk 17 hari 2009...cepatnya rasa masa berlalu. 31st Januari ni dah nak fly balik Malaysia. Yabedabedoooo...tak sabarnya. (Macamlah keja tu dah siap Puan Zuratul!!) apa2pun balik tetap balik! sebulan pun jadiklah...datang sini kejap then balik lagik...insyaAllah for gud this time...so tunggu mama iyaaa my sweethearts. Selepas semua diputuskan terasa ringan sket kepala! Cuma sekarang masih belum ada kekuatan untuk inform my in-laws pasal kena datang balik sini n will need their help to take care of Fahmi n Fatini for a few months more! Ooohhh... terasa too much dah...but there is no other choices. I will cakap secepat mungkin (huhuhuhu!)

Kena abehkan apa yang telah dimulakan... never stop trying n working n praying

Decission is made!!

After my meeting with my sv last Monday...and after thinking about all the possibilities and consequences. I have made my decission...here it is: I will come back to Melbourne for another 4 months ( Mar-July 09) without taking my kids with me. I know it's may sound a bit cruel! I would say that i'd love to bring them here...atleast Fahmi n Fatini will get experience with OZ education. However lets look at the bright side... I can focus on my works for this period of time and hopefully by May finishing my tesis and submit it. Then I can focus on writing my other stuffs....publication n etc. BUT all depends on my visa application either will be granted or not! If not granted...there you go.. Yebedabedooo... i will be staying in Malaysia-writing up. (sigh wishing the best for everybody!)

Anyway... i hope i will get the strength to be away for another 4 months with my family. and Fahmi n Fatini will be strong enough facing another separation with me!!! I LOVE BOTH of U alwez n forever!!! Please forgive mama for doing this again. I promise this will be the last time...after that we will be together n forever! InsyaAllah...with Allah permission.

Okie dokie..back to works and keep u head down Zura...u need to finish all these very soon!!! Chaiyok!chaiyok!chaiyok!.....

Dunno what to do...

I dunno what to do...really hard to make a decission if everything is not finalized yet!!! I wanna to stay but if I stay...i have to have money!!! oooooo dear... it's make my life miserable! i can't focus with this thingy hanging on my mind. I wanna to go back.... i need my family now! n my family need me badly especially the little one! Fahmi n Fatini already 6yrs n 4 yrs old. Fahmi need a proper education and now he doesn't want to go to school unless i am back with him... Bizzare! What an idiot and selfish mom am I?!!... But my things here is not settle yet! oooooo dear... my heart and soul hurt so much when I think about my kids n my husband ( n my parent in-law n my mom). Oooooo dear.... I dunno what to do. So much sacrifice they did for me... more that i could imagine! I can't live without them...my sweethearts.

Oooooo dear. I love to stay for the sake of my works. Prioritize things...family...PhD...? Now I want to finish off what I've into for 4 yrs.... sigh! Bad mom..bad mon..bad mom..that's what I am.

I DUNNO WHAT TO DO!