Gambar terbaru my Kids...

My hubby baru aja forward gambar terbaru F&F. Gambar ni diambil masa kenduri akikah Amir and pindah rumah adik ipar (adik Fazly).

Gambar si tembam Amir with mak n Zul

Ni lak adik dengan gaya rambut terbaru!

(sekarang kena panggil kakak...sb dia ader cousin2 yg panggil dia kakak!! hikhikhik kena marah tu kalau panggil adik!)

F&F yang memang susah nak posing bergambar... ader2 aja!! :))

( I miss them like crazy!)

Rasanya Fatini dah kurus sket daripada bulan 2 ritu... rambut dah panjang tp tak nampak sgt sb dia posing ngada2... mak kata dia semakin lasak n lagi banyak akal daripada abangnya (hikhikhik n kuat merajuk!). ;) Fahmi pulak dah behave n semakin bijak... semalam tepon pun dia dah mau cakap if alwez alahai susahnya nak bercakap! Siap nyanyi lah kan... :))

Can't wait to go back! Hari ni akan siapkan packing kotak2 so next few weeks just concentrate my thesis! Otak ni tak settle selagi belum habis packing... n satu lagi masalah ader aja yg nak beli... so better shipping secepat mungkin otherwise bertambah2 lagik... sekarang lak TOYS SALES is on! Gileeerrr hapa... teruja bangeeeet... ;)

Anyway gtg..nak g opis kejap before my fren mai rumah tolong habiskan urusan kotak2...

Okie dokie... Malaysia here i come...

A shoulder to cry on

Life is full of lots of up and downs,
And the distance feels further when you're headed for the ground,
And there is nothing more painful than to let you're feelings take you down,
It's so hard to know the way you feel inside,
When there's many thoughts and feelings that you hide,
But you might feel better if you let me walk with you
by your side,

And when you need a shoulder to cry on,
When you need a friend to rely on,
When the whole world is gone,
You won't be alone,
cause I'll be there,

I'll be your shoulder to cry on,
I'll be there,
I'll be a friend to rely on,
When the whole world is gone,
you won't be alone,
cause I'll be there.

All of the times when everything is wrong
And you're feeling like
There's no use going on
You can't give it up
I hope you work it out and carry on
Side by side,
With you till the end
I'll always be the one to firmly hold your hand
no matter what is said or done
our love will always continue on

Everyone needs a shoulder to cry on
everyone needs a friend to rely on
When the whole world is gone
you won't be alone
cause I'll be there
I'll be your shoulder to cry on
I'll be there
I'll be the one you rely on
when the whole world's gone
you won't be alone
cause I'll be there!

And when the whole world is gone
You'll always have my shoulder to cry on....

Sebulan jer lagik...

Salaam... tak sabarnyer nak bertemu muka dengan kekasih hati! (walaupun masih perang dingin!). Thesis masih belum jadi but hati dah dekat Malaysia... decission untuk balik dah dibuat..apa2 yang bakal terjadi aku pasrah dengan ketentuan Allah. Aku akan terus berusaha sehingga habis... walaupun kena sambung menulis dekat Malaysia n aku rasa itu yang terbaik buat diriku n famili! I need them n they need me, especially Fahmi...la ni tido malam pun termimpi2 teringat2 babah n mama... kesian dia. But aku positif, insyaAllah harapnya semua akan berjalan dengan lancar setibanya aku di Malaysia (sigh! i hope so...tawakkal).

Nostalgia di Botanical Garden, Melbourne

Takder gambar terbaru...ini aja buat pengubat rinduuu...

Mak kata rambut fatini dah lepas bahu n sekarang dia dah ok kalau kena ikat rambut... dah tak serabai cam dulu. ;) Fahmi pulak dah pandai mengeja n faham sket2 kalau kita cakap English... sekarang dia dah pandai tengok jam n faham pasal date n month. ermmm...asyik tanya bila bulan 7 sebab mama janji nak balik bulan 7 (minta maaf sangat2 dear, mama terpaksa tunda ke bulan ogos!) (sigh!)

Baru aja habih packing barang...hahaha ingatkan tak banyak. Last2 hampir 30 kotak jugaklah. Ni second trip shipping. entah hapa2 aja... selagi tak hantaq akan bertambah barang2 n kotak2!! Harapnya next week bolehlah hantaq... no more buying...n shopping.

Baju2 dalam almari pun tinggal sket aja, cukup untuk 3-4 minggu aku kat sini. Now pun dah kurang ke opis so tak kisah sangatlah kan. ;) pakai apa yg patut kat umah!! hikhikhik. Tp masalah terbaru adalah aku gila beli kasut lah plak!! dah bersusun2 sabo ajalah.

Ermm...ni sebenonya resting from my thesis writing... poning eden! nak habihkan satu perenggan pun amik masa berjam2. Aduhai..siapkah nih?!! Positif-positif-positif Zura! :

Oklah i'd better get going...nak tidoooo esok ader labworks! n hahahahaaa final shopping for my nephews - nak bag lah plak kan ;)

* balik? tak balik?

I am blessed...

Alhamdullillah...I am blessed! Thank you for everything my dear!

I smell sumething fishy...

I am truly madly deeply inlove....

Truly Madly Deeply-Savage Garden

I'll be your dream
I'll be your wish
I'll be your fantasy.
I'll be your hope
I'll be your love
Be everything that you need.
I love you more with every breath Truly madly deeply do..
I will be strong
I will be faithful
'Cos I'm counting on a new beginning.
A reason for living.
A deeper meaning.

Chorus

I want to stand with you on a mountain.
I want to bathe with you in the sea.
I want to lay like this forever.
Until the sky falls down on me...

And when the stars are shining brightly
In the velvet sky,
I'll make a wish
Send it to heaven
Then make you want to cry..
The tears of joy
For all the pleasure and the certainty.
That we're surrounded
By the comfort and protection of..
The highest power.
In lonely hours.
The tears devour you..
I want to stand with you on a mountain,
I want to bathe with you in the sea.
I want to lay like this forever,
Until the sky falls down on me...
Bridge

Oh can't you see it baby?
You don't have to close your eyes
'Cos it's standing right before you.
All that you need will surely come...

I'll be your dream
I'll be your wish
I'll be your fantasy.
I'll be your hope
I'll be your love Be everything that you need.
I'll love you more with every breath Truly madly deeply do... Chorus

I LOVE YOU KANDA....

apa cerita..

Isyh..dah agak lama ek tak jenguk blog ni yer...banyak benda yang happening lately...banyak keja yang kena siapkan n the dateline semakin hampir! Terasa semakin seram sejuk!..takut tak sempat. Bukannya apa janji mesti ditepati. rindu dekat insan yang tercinta pun semakin dalam...semakin parah...terasa nak terbang balik walaupun cuma sehari!

Sekarang kalau telefon Fahmi n Fatini..soklan pertama ditanya..ini bulan apa?!! oh baby...mama akan pulang... sabar ya! Pressure sangat k...

Seperti kata org tua2..'Bukan senang nak jadik senang nih!'... time2 gini baru tau benarnya pepatah tu. Apa2 pun i have to focus on my tasks.

Teringat dekat kakak2 ku...kak ros, kak enie, kak laily, kak riza n list goes on....camner semua org struggle nak abehkan belajaq nih! Ya Allah, berikanlah aku hambaMu yang kerdil ini kekuatan...menyelesaikan semuanya dengan jayanya.

Oklah...enough! i need to get back to my thingy... till then.

Terasa cam nak balik...

My Family

This is my family...my hubby (Fazly), Fahmi (son) n Fatini (doter). These photos taken during our trip to Sabah.

Ni Abang n Adik di War Memorial, Kundasang

Fahmi atas boat ke Pulau Manukan

Fatini ni time atas boat jugak..ke Pulau Manukan

Actually tgh dok miss sumer nih! tu yang dok upload gambo2 nih....rini birthday hubby but tak dapat celebrate sesama....

nway...everything will be over very soon...insyaAllah. Love u alwez n forever!

21st March...my dearest hubby's birthday

Happy Birthday Kanda Sayang!!!

Fren's Wedding

Today entry is specially dedicated to Sid (eventhough u might not read this!)....

Sid -(middle wearing black n white scarf)

CONGRATULATION DEAR!

Actually i really want to stay back in Malaysia n attending this particular wedding...however due to my responsibility here in Melbourne I can't! Sid even i am in Melbourne.. i can still feel it!!! It's remind me of my big day...ermmmm it was around 6 years ago!! hikhikhik

Anyway today is your day Sid. I'm sure u can't stop smiling n trying to hide the nervousness...(even... the truth is u r sooo tired!!) hikhikhik.... Enjoy to the fullest this very day!

CONGRATULATION!!!

LOtloves:Kakzura

Final Chapter of my Journey, In Melbourne

When i first arrived at the melbourne aiport last Sunday night...my heart was pounding very hard!!! Will this be my last trip back here, as a student??!!! I've asked myself about one thing, THIS IS IT!!! I don't want to break my promises to my beloved kids n hubby. I just cannot forget the way my kids looking at me at the KLIA....it's made me wanna cry! i love both of you!

As usual...Fahmi he was very cool when I first told him that i am leaving to Melbourne again... but after he absorbed and maybe already tired thinking about this...he came to me a few days later with a milllion dollars question... mama, berapa lama mama nak g? Mimi n adik oleh ikut tak?!! errmmmm..time dia tanya tu berair mata...huhuhuhu... it was the toughest moment ever in my life. I've explained to him and he kept on counting how many days i will be away from him! I called him last night and he keep asking when i will coming back. ! I love you both! I love you alwez n forever!

I have nothing to give them now...only that i have to keep my promise and be back with them as soon as i can!!!! InsyaAllah....

Alhamdullillah...

Alhamdullillah...all the meetings is done for now! I was too nervous n worried with this one major meeting...and alhamdullilah it was turn out not too bad...gud indeed! alhamdullillah praise to the Almighty. I hope that the grant that we apply will be granted. I just praying for the best! What ever the outcome is... i'm ok!

So now...i can focus on my trip back home..yipeeeeeeeee!!! i'm too excited! i have to do more shopping...thanks to my hubby for his last minute lists. :) tonight we gonna have a bbq (oppssss..fireban today!!) so i'm not sure what is going to happen...cancel or just proceed with extra precaution!! huhuhuhu bbq...bbq...bbq...i'm starving it's 4pm now and i haven't eat anything from morning...nervous strucked me sooo badly leave me not having my breakfast&lunch. and now i am starving...

At the office for my last day...update the important documents n tidy up my desk n say gudbye to everyone. Thanks for yesterday lunch my dear officemates... it was very nice....a part of walking in the oven's weathering! And now...i going to pen off and go home...n EAT.

Daaaaaa....till then...

WEDNESDAY is down...2 days to go...

Wed, Thurs, Fri....SATURDAY!

The atmosphere is now HOT! HOT! HOT!! The waiting is killing me....

I wanna go home rite now!!

I wanna fly home rite away!!!!! that is my feeling rite now! too many things to be done n yet i don't have the heart to do all of them! terrible feeling. terrible attitude.huhuhuhuhu.

saya nak balik jumpak..fazly fahmi fatini. nak balik jumpak mak. ayah-notsure.sumer.kaklong.kakchik.iwan.huhuhu.sangat2 rindu.sangat2 tak sabaq nak balik. barang2 dah pack kalau nak balik sekarang pun dah buleh!. cuma tix tarikhnya 31 jan 09 at 3.40pm. kalau tukaq tarikh kena bayaq lagik. det dah abih. so kenalah sabaq2kan diri dan stay fokus. takleh fokus dah nih...huhuhuhu.

I LOVE U ALL....

Next week balik...insyaAllah. yabedabedooo..tak sabarnya. be a mom again. be a wife again. be a daughter again. be a sis again. Life is so wonderful back home. Someone that you love and care is close to you. Hope everything goes well before balik...amin

You've got message...

Alhamdullillah my student visa have been granted today by Ms Janetta Velkovska officer of DIAC, Mebourne. I am grateful that Allah eased my journey so far! It was just a simple email...but it made my heart filled with joy and hope!

Dear Ms Abdul Hamid,

Please note, that i have granted your student today and sent out the letter with your documents. You now have a valid visa until the 21/09/2009

Janetta Velkovski
Case ManagerVisa and Citizenship Services
03 8682 2039

There was alwez sign for me...like for this time i've noticed sumthing when i've got her contact number...ermmm looking gud! her contact number ended with my lucky number!!! 39. I dunno why I alwez serounded by these two numbers. It made me a bit nervous n wondered how thing will turn out for me... and alhamdullillah-visa granted.

I am thankful to the Almighty for his approval. He knows what the best for us...

You gotta be

Listen as your day unfolds

Challenge what the future holds

Try and keep your head up to the sky

Lovers, they may cause you tears

Go ahead release your fears

Stand up and be counted

Don't be ashamed to cry

You gotta be bad, you gotta be bold, you gotta be wiser

You gotta be hard, you gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger

You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm, you gotta stay together

All I know, all I know, love will save the day

Herald what your mother said

Reading the books your father read

Try to solve the puzzles in your own sweet time

Some may have more cash than you

Others take a different view

My oh my, heh, hey

You gotta be bad, you gotta be bold, you gotta be wiser

You gotta be hard, you gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger

You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm, you gotta stay together

All I know, all I know, love will save the day

Don't ask no questions, it goes on without you

Leaving you behind if you can't stand the pace

The world keeps on spinning

You can't stop it, if you try to

This time it's danger staring you in the face

Remember

Listen as your day unfolds

Challenge what the future holds

Try and keep your head up to the sky

Lovers, they may cause you tears

Go ahead release your fears

My oh my heh, hey, hey

You gotta be bad, you gotta be bold, you gotta be wiser

You gotta be hard, you gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger

You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm, you gotta stay together

All I know, all I know, love will save the day

You gotta be bad, you gotta be bold, you gotta be wiser

You gotta be hard, you gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger

You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm, you gotta stay together

All I know, all I know, love will save the day

You gotta be lyrics by Des'ree

17 Januari 2009

Hellooo sayang mama...hari ni terasa mendalam betul rindduuuuu dekat my dearest sweethearts yang dok di PB n Bukit Rambai tuh...My hubby tengah dok demam..kesian dier..sabar yer... Yang dok Bukit Rambai pun baru ja lepas baik dari demam... musim agaknya kat Malaysia! Yang kat Melbourne pun rasanya seram sejuk badan dek kerana cuaca yang tak menentu...kejap panas kejap sejuk...tak tahan betullah.

Hari ni dah masuk 17 hari 2009...cepatnya rasa masa berlalu. 31st Januari ni dah nak fly balik Malaysia. Yabedabedoooo...tak sabarnya. (Macamlah keja tu dah siap Puan Zuratul!!) apa2pun balik tetap balik! sebulan pun jadiklah...datang sini kejap then balik lagik...insyaAllah for gud this time...so tunggu mama iyaaa my sweethearts. Selepas semua diputuskan terasa ringan sket kepala! Cuma sekarang masih belum ada kekuatan untuk inform my in-laws pasal kena datang balik sini n will need their help to take care of Fahmi n Fatini for a few months more! Ooohhh... terasa too much dah...but there is no other choices. I will cakap secepat mungkin (huhuhuhu!)

Kena abehkan apa yang telah dimulakan... never stop trying n working n praying

Decission is made!!

After my meeting with my sv last Monday...and after thinking about all the possibilities and consequences. I have made my decission...here it is: I will come back to Melbourne for another 4 months ( Mar-July 09) without taking my kids with me. I know it's may sound a bit cruel! I would say that i'd love to bring them here...atleast Fahmi n Fatini will get experience with OZ education. However lets look at the bright side... I can focus on my works for this period of time and hopefully by May finishing my tesis and submit it. Then I can focus on writing my other stuffs....publication n etc. BUT all depends on my visa application either will be granted or not! If not granted...there you go.. Yebedabedooo... i will be staying in Malaysia-writing up. (sigh wishing the best for everybody!)

Anyway... i hope i will get the strength to be away for another 4 months with my family. and Fahmi n Fatini will be strong enough facing another separation with me!!! I LOVE BOTH of U alwez n forever!!! Please forgive mama for doing this again. I promise this will be the last time...after that we will be together n forever! InsyaAllah...with Allah permission.

Okie dokie..back to works and keep u head down Zura...u need to finish all these very soon!!! Chaiyok!chaiyok!chaiyok!.....

Dunno what to do...

I dunno what to do...really hard to make a decission if everything is not finalized yet!!! I wanna to stay but if I stay...i have to have money!!! oooooo dear... it's make my life miserable! i can't focus with this thingy hanging on my mind. I wanna to go back.... i need my family now! n my family need me badly especially the little one! Fahmi n Fatini already 6yrs n 4 yrs old. Fahmi need a proper education and now he doesn't want to go to school unless i am back with him... Bizzare! What an idiot and selfish mom am I?!!... But my things here is not settle yet! oooooo dear... my heart and soul hurt so much when I think about my kids n my husband ( n my parent in-law n my mom). Oooooo dear.... I dunno what to do. So much sacrifice they did for me... more that i could imagine! I can't live without them...my sweethearts.

Oooooo dear. I love to stay for the sake of my works. Prioritize things...family...PhD...? Now I want to finish off what I've into for 4 yrs.... sigh! Bad mom..bad mon..bad mom..that's what I am.

I DUNNO WHAT TO DO!